27 Things Men are Thinking About Right Now
1. Why is it that in films and on TV, cute girls fall for really goofy guys but in real life, all the cute girls fall for formula 1 drivers and hedge fund tycoons?
2. What our mother would think…
3. When will our partners realize that no hand bag is worth that much?
4. Whether anything we do will give us 6- pack abs.
5. Why it is that we are not, actually, planetary king because we’d sure as hell do a better job than the current crop of world leaders.
6. The look on your face the first time we met you.
7. What did Kate Moss ever see in Pete Doherty?
8. Am I doing this right?
9. If the situation arose, would we act heroically?
10. Why is our generation the one that has to go green?
11. Whether or not, if we were Peter Parker, we’d tell Mary Jane that we were Spiderman.
12. I am the best looking, sexiest, most confident man in this place….??
13. Am I the only one who thinks Michelle Obama is kind of hot?
14. Would women prefer if we skipped the intercourse part and stuck to the oral part? And while we think about it, do you think they just prefer vibrators and are just being nice to us?
15. Whether or not you mean it when you say you won’t try to change us?
16. Why does our penis curve to the left?
17. How can it be that, despite men’s fashion magazines and all the amazing clothes out there, we are still so clueless about what to wear.
18. Why is it that we can cook, but the women we date can’t?
19. When they say “premature ejaculation” what exactly counts as “premature”?
20. Adding up the price of housing, airline tickets, vehicles, not to mention the clothing budget,,, how much would a harem really cost?
21. How much fun it would be to punch President George W.
22. It’s big enough. Well, sort of average. No, really.
23. All the reasons why we would have been the better choice to play James Bond.
24. How weird it is that lately there doesn’t seem to be much difference between sports, entertainment, politics and porn.
25. If all men could pool their cash, how much money would it take to cure every STD (Because we really hate condoms).
26. How far we can pee.
27. If we ought to tell you how intensely we love you.