Have you ever known a woman who would ditch her friends for a man? For example: On Monday, she would make plans to go with you to an exhibit and by Friday, the plans were altered because the new guy she met on an internet dating site just happened to call. Being the friend that you are, you always seem to understand and say that it is no big deal.
Unfortunately, deep inside you began to feel a bit neglected and resentful. Mental note ladies; men don’t break plans with the fellas for you, so you might want to think it about it before you cancel plans with your girlfriends for him. Actually, if he cares that deeply about you, he would probably insist that you keep you current plans.
There is a popular policy in business where it’s “first come, first served.” Why can’t it be that way in relationships? If the relationship is strong enough, being with friends every now and then should not tear you apart. It may actually make it stronger because it shows you have a life outside of him. Friends should be just as important as new partner and more than likely you probably have known your friends longer.
While you’re reading this you’re probably saying to yourself that a woman should never let a her friends come between her and her man. Well the flip side of that is true as well; a woman should never let her man come between her and her friends. It’s too bad that we all know someone who’s done that, and we may even be looking at her in the mirror. And when the friends are dropped, all that extra time is spent with the new guy.
Their newfound relationship consumes their whole life. They barely call their friends just to chat, and have no desire to since the woman feels that he is all she needs. Sometimes her productivity at works slows down or her career plans are put on hold for him. Some of you may be saying “oh, that’s not me”, but it can happen unconsciously.
Love is supposed to complement who you are. It’s not supposed to leave you brain dead and lose your friends and maybe even your job. If the relationship doesn’t last, you’ll need your friends more than ever. The same people that you don’t have time for now will be the one picking up the pieces when your lover hits the road.
Although your friends may not say it, they probably wanted to confront you all along, but were apprehensive about putting a barrier on the friendship. Most caring friends keep their mouth shut and just listen to the sob story that is entirely of your own making.
If your guy doesn’t understand that you have a life outside of him, which includes your friends, then you simply don’t need him in your life. A women needn’t lose her identity to fall in love and become part of a couple.
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